Point That Finger at Yourself!

What Love Is Not. By Yomi Owope

Hey Guys, remember when I asked the question "what is love" in my last post on marriage? Well, Yomi Owope sent me this. I find it profound and I think you will also. You can comment with what you think love is not as well. E.g "love is not...". Love is not the idea that I take your freedom in exchange for mine; it is not the fashionable remembrance of anniversaries and birthdays, nor is it the poolside dinner at Smith's with live music and the smell of fresh flowers. I will not tell you that love is the food of the eyes at the sight of light skin and long hair or the fodder for the mind at the whiff of Rabanne. I will not say that love must do for me what I did because of it; neither will one beg quittance of me for a deed done for love. Is love measured by the length of a fathers rod or the gleam of a wife's Gucci? Is it benchmarked by a Bishop's heavy holiness or the fiery fervency of the union leader?

A Constant Contest?

I have come to realize that in life, we are almost ALWAYS in competition whether consciously or unconsciously.Check out the following definition of competition from The Merristem-Webster Dictionary: “…active demand by two or more organisms or kinds of organisms for some resource in short supply”, emphasis on the phrase "in short supply". Have you ever wondered why on the average, we spend the first two decades of our lives getting an education? From Primary School, to Secondary School, to College, we study hard to graduate with good grades. During those years, we write exams, participate in sporting events, get into fights, play games and generally engage in activities that expose us to the concept of winning and losing. On graduating from school, we proceed to the labour market, where it would seem success is heavily hinged on competition. We compete against fellow graduates to emerge the best candidate for the job, we compete against fellow colleagues to get a promot...

I Cheat on my Wife...And It's Her Fault!

“The problem is that once a woman hears the two words ‘I do’, her attitude changes” he said to me matter-of-factly in response to my question “why do you think men cheat on their wives?” I was having this interesting conversation with Mr. Brian (not his real name) who had been married for over 15 years and well…has apparently had his fair share of extra-marital affairs. For me, this was an opportunity to take a walk in the mind of a type of man many of us are quick to judge – the cheating spouse. While I do not agree with everything Mr. Brian said, he made a number of valid points that I’d like to share. Of course he places 80% of the blame of the cheating husband on the woman. His premise is that once a man marries a woman, the woman’s attitude changes because she believes she has conquered him. She often abandons the precedents that she had set before marriage, forgetting that those old habits were the very reason the man married her.

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